Throw, Keep or Give away?

Still waiting for us to move. Still no definite plans. My life is on hold in the sense of I don't know which direction our family is going. Are we moving or not?

In the meantime, I sort things out everyday just to be prepared. Throw, keep, or give away? Baby things, furniture, clothes, my books!, shoes, bags, kitchen stuff, toys, tons of letters/ cards/ certificates/ memorabilia,   etc etc etc. Been trying to organize and simplify the material things in my life. I realized I really have a problem with letting go. I should have started this a long time ago to give me more time to deal with this separation anxiety. Yesterday I was thinking about why it is so difficult for me to do this.
I decided to think about what the items symbolize for me. Like the art works my kids gave me symbolize their love for me. How can I throw these away?!? Arrgh!!!! Anyway, I plan to keep doing this for the next couple of days ( maybe weeks) so I can analyze what makes me cling to the "clutter" and maybe try to console myself with the thought that their love will always be in theirs and my heart. No need to prove this over and over with material things. As for the other things, it will cost a bit more but since I can't bring everything, I guess I can always buy new things!


Speaking of throw, keep or give away... my problem does not only apply to material things. I think I tend to hoard memories too. This shouldn't normally be a problem but I guess I also need to clean out the anger and bad memories that continue to affect my daily life/ mood/ outlook. My new realization : Keep and treasure the good memories, throw the bad/ hurtful/ painful memories and instead give away or share the lessons I have learned. Take note that  again this is just my realization and doesn't mean smooth sailing from now on. I think i have made a lot of progress but there is still a lot of work in progress too. It is not easy for me to forget the memories of infidelity. I just wonder if I am attached to them like I am attached to the material things. I say attached because I also can't seem to let go of them. I continue to allow them to control my thoughts and feelings. No wonder I can't move on to improve our relationship.

So the lesson for today (that I should remember) is Throw the bad, Keep the good and Give Away what you can share. This applies to both my material things and my memories. Then I think if I can do this,  I can peacefully and courageously move on to the next phase of my life... with brand new things and build better memories!